It makes total sense why I'm on Pinterest now, right? Because I have a wedding to plan (false), a home to decorate (also false) and recipes to organize (still false). Really it's just one of those things that I waste time on. I see cool stuff and I "pin" it so I can look at it later... it's super great. Or not.
Anyways. This isn't meant to be a Pinterest rant! There actually are some reasons I like the site, and one of these is the fact that sometimes I find encouraging/inspiring/funny quotes. Stuff like,
or,
or,
or even
.It's sometimes goofy and sometimes pointless, but then there are times when I see something that genuinely strikes a chord with me - that sets me thinking and puts courage in my heart.
The problem is, there are also pins that concern me. They're the ones that may sound good initially, but communicate something that is actually deeply disturbing. These pins say things like this,
or,
or,
or one that seems to be a particular favorite,
.Obviously there is a theme to all of these. I'm sharing them because they all communicate a popular idea in today's generation. It sounds good, to a point... repairing individuals' self-worth is something that I do think that a lot of people - young women in particular - are in need of. But that's a talk for another day.
I would argue that the ideas being communicated here hold a frightening potential to tear lives apart.
The ideas expressed here say that when people mistreat me - fail to "be there" for me, desert me, talk poorly of me, stop loving me, refuse to make time for me, treat me as ordinary - I have every right to walk away. I deserve more, and they need to learn respect.
But do you know what I noticed about the sentence above?
Me. Me, me, me, me, me, me.
Yikes. That sends a red flag up in my brain.
As a Christ follower, I'm immediately compelled to compare these quotes with what the Word of God says. As it turns out, I'm having trouble finding anything that communicates these kinds of values. Here's just a few examples of what I found:
“Therefore, as God's chosen people,
holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves
with compassion, kindness, humility,
gentleness and patience. Bear with each
other and forgive whatever grievances
you may have against one another.
Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And
over all these virtues put on love, which
binds them all together in perfect unity.”
~ Colossians 3:12-14
The word "bear" stands out to me here. "Bear with each other" sounds so much messier than "love each other," or "forgive each other," both of which we are also asked to practice. And yet something about "bearing" with people who have grieved me speaks differently to me. It's not easy. It's not pretty. But I'm called to it, nonetheless.
“But the wisdom that comes from
heaven is first of all pure; then peace
loving, considerate, submissive, full
of mercy and good fruit, impartial
and sincere.” ~ James 3:17
This verse gives me a little more comfort, reminding me that this wisdom regarding how to love and bear with people I struggle with comes from heaven, not from me. It's not about gritting my teeth and forcing myself to produce good fruit in my life and self. A tree doesn't force itself to bear fruit, it comes about naturally! In the same way, the ability to live in peace with others, to be considerate, submissive, full of mercy, impartial and sincere comes as a natural byproduct of my connection with the source of Life. He is the Vine, I am the branch, and he enables me to produce the fruit that would otherwise be counterfeit and short-lived.
And of course, the classic verse so often quoted but so rarely embodied...
"But I tell you, Do not resist an evil person.
If someone strikes you on the right cheek,
turn to him the other also." ~ Matthew 5:39
Oi. How do you even begin to unpack a verse like this without sounding like a hypocrite? I could talk all day about how important it is to live this out - loving our enemies and praying for those who persecute us - but the truth is that it is so counter-cultural, so unnatural, it's something that I feel only God can actually reveal to our hearts.
That's the thing about Jesus. He isn't like a virtual pinboard - no matter how hard I may try, I cannot "pin" my thoughts, feelings or ideas on him. Just because something sounds good doesn't mean it's true. Jesus came and refused to conform to the standards of his time. He asked hard questions, broke religious rules, flipped tables, and challenged just about every "norm" his culture lived under.
Today, Jesus hasn't changed a bit. He makes me uncomfortable, he pulls the carpet out from under my pre-conceived ideas, turns my world on its head, and offers me a better story than what I would otherwise settle for.
Only he offers me the "mad, passionate, extraordinary love" that the quote above talks about. There is nothing mediocre about the way he loves me, but there is also nothing mediocre about the way he loves the person who bugs me most in life. The people who we think aren't worth our time, the people who have done unspeakably hurtful things and who have never truly loved anyone are just as loved, desired and valuable to the King of Kings as Mother Theresa was, the woman who spent her love everywhere she went.
It's almost earth-shattering, isn't it?
I've loved Jesus my whole life, but every time I actually sit down to think about it my mind is blown again.
And because I've decided to let Jesus in to begin transforming my mind and heart - an incredibly long and difficult process - I'm learning an alternative to the knee-jerk reaction of turning my back on the people who hurt me, hate me, or annoy me. If I let him into my interactions with those people, Jesus's mad, passionate, extraordinary love produces a different reaction in me.
Jesus says that everyone I encounter is worth his time, therefore they are worth mine, too. No one is beneath me. No one is disqualified, no one is ineligible of his love. No one. So why do I think I can excuse them?
Jesus in me, the hope of glory, is up to something pretty crazy. It's still unnatural. It's still uncomfortable. But it's good. Don't miss out.
"It’s in Christ that we find out who we are
and what we are living for. Long before we
first heard of Christ and got our hopes up,
he had his eye on us, had designs on us for
glorious living, part of the overall purpose
he is working out in everything and everyone."
~ Ephesians 1:11-12
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