My Top 15 Worship Songs

I just read a blog post by my senior pastor sharing his top 10 favorite worship songs right now. It inspired me, and I decided to do the same... only problem was, it was impossible to pick just ten. So instead, here are my top 15 favorite worship songs right now, in no particular order.

#1. True Love by Phil Wickham. I heard this for the first time in the Furnace Prayer Room at our church. I was moved to tears by it, and still am. Favorite line - "When blood and water hit the ground, walls we couldn't move came crashing down."

#2. How He Loves by John Mark McMillan. Who doesn't love this song? He loves us. It's such a powerful revelation to receive... I hope I never get used to it. Favorite line - "If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking."

#3. Jesus Paid It All by Kristian Stanfill. This is another song that brings me to tears almost every time I hear it, and another revelation I hope I never grow accustomed to... He paid it all. Favorite line - "Oh praise the One who paid my debt, and raised this life up from the dead!"

#4. Yahweh by New Life Worship. Declaring to God who He is. We may not realize it, but I think it does something incredible in our hearts. Favorite line - "Ancient One, so amazing, unfailing You are."

#5. Dance With Me by Chris Quilala. Heard this for the first time at my youth group's fall retreat last year. It gave me a new understanding of what it means for Jesus to be the Lover of my soul. Favorite line - "To me you have run, my Beloved, You've captured my heart."

#6. I'll Always Love You by Phil Wickham. This song has become an anthem for me. Even when I don't feel Him, my heart is decided. I will always love Him. "Forever I will tell You, yeah I'll scream until it hurts, that I can't live without You, You are Heaven, I am Earth."

#7. Deeper by Delirious. This song always makes me smile. The lyrics just seem like something I would write. Favorite line - "And the wonder of it all, is I'm livin' just to fall more in love with You!"

#8. Highest Place by Desperation Band. This song always brings me peace. I love singing about how near He is. Favorite line - "In the glory of Your glory, I become like You are - it's overwhelming."

#9. From the Inside Out by Hillsong. I first heard this song around the time I was going on my missions trip to Jamaica. It has become another anthem of my heart. Favorite line - "My heart and my soul, I give You control, consume me from the inside out, Lord."

#10. You Won't Relent by Misty Edwards. This song makes me wonder how we would live if we really knew how relentlessly He pursues us. Favorite line - "For there is Love that is as strong as death, jealousy demanding as the grave. And many waters cannot quench this Love."

#11. Always Forever by Phil Wickham. A song I recently discovered by my favorite artist, I can't get enough of this. I want Jesus to be the love I need, the air I breathe. Favorite line - "I would lay down my life, just to be by Your side."

#12. Magnificent Obsession by Steven Curtis Chapman. This song is an old favorite. More than anything else, I want Jesus to be my magnificent obsession. Favorite line - "This is everything I want, this is everything I need. I want this to be my one consuming passion."

#13. You Are For Me by Kari Jobe. This is such a soothing song. On crazy days where I have trouble finding Him, I sometimes turn this song on to remember who He is. Favorite line - "I know that You have come down, even if to write upon my heart, to remind me who You are."

#14. Hosanna by Christy Nockels. While in Germany, God used this song to show me how great He is and how great His love is for His people. He is so worthy of our praise. Favorite line - "Break my heart for what breaks Yours, everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause."

#15. You Are My Passion by Jesus Culture. We sang this song at the Desperation conference this summer, and it's yet another song declaring my desire to make Him my one passion in life. Favorite line - "My strength in life is I am Yours, my soul delights because I am Yours."

Well, that's all fifteen. I hope that if nothing else, this has given you some new music to soak up. Enjoy.

God... In My Own Image

"The most portentous fact about any man is not what he at a given time may say or do, but what he in his deep heart conceives God to be like." ~A.W. Tozer

If you were to ask me what the over-arching theme of this summer's walk with Jesus was for me, I would say it was the realization of who He is and why I follow Him.

At the Desperation Conference this year, I found myself struggling to "connect" during worship. While everyone else was experiencing some of the purest encounters with God they had ever had, I "just didn't feel it."

God doesn't want me faking praise, I thought. So I'll just wait to truly connect until I really feel like it. That way I'm not trying to look like I'm having this great worship moment while inside I am feeling dry and still waiting to experience God.

And I would pray. Pray for a powerful revelation from God that would spur me on to a meaningful worship time.

But worship session after worship session, no inspiration would come. I engaged, but not at the level I usually would. But trying to do anything more when I didn't feel like it seemed so artificial. How could that be pleasing to God?

Then I attended a talk by Aaron Stern, the college and 20-somethings pastor at New Life. He began by pointing out our tendency to look at God as something less than He is. We all have a way of understanding God, Stern explained, it just doesn't ever do Him justice.

He then proceeded to take an in-depth look at the beginning of Genesis 1:1, which says,

"In the beginning God created the heavens..."

He showed us photo after photo of glorious star clusters, galaxies, and nebulae. When you look at the sheer size of the work of God's hands, it really does force you to look at Him with a whole new sense of awe. Don't believe me? Check this out:

http://www.postimage.org/image.php?v=gx1G8GWS

WOW. Every time I look at that, and believe me when I say it's been at least 15 times, I wonder who the heck I think I am. It forces me to turn to the Psalms and say with King David,

"I look up at your macro-skies, dark and enormous,
your handmade sky-jewelry,
Moon and stars mounted in their settings.
Then I look at myself and wonder,
Why do you bother with us?
Why take a second look our way?"
~(Psalm 8:3-4, The Message)

By the end of Stern's talk, I was floored. Suddenly, I realized what was wrong. I was expecting the Almighty God, Yahweh, to conform to my momentary feelings and emotions. I was asking Him to cater to me.

In essence, I had been telling Him that He needed to earn my praise.

Even as I sat typing that last sentence, I put my head in my hands and laughed at my idiocy... "I look at my self and wonder... Why do you bother with me? Why do you take a second look my way?"

God never promised that we'll always feel like worshipping Him.

Yet in the moments where I can't feel His presence, I don't sense His goodness, I feel surrounded by my enemies, or simply can't see past my circumstances, I want to be able to say, "This may be my situation, but You are worthy."

In a worship session following Aaron Stern's talk, Phil Wickham sang his song called "I'll Always Love You." As we came to the chorus, I sang with deep conviction, knowing that regardless of what my emotions may tell me, that something had been decided in me that day.

"Forever I will tell You,

Yeah, I'll scream until it hurts,

That I can't live without You,

You are Heaven, I am Earth.

And even from the moment

That You saved my life I knew,

That I would always love You."

It's Been A While...

Wow... long time no write.

To be completely honest, I probably could've found the time between June 14th and now to write here, but I've just been so completely caught up with my summer that I didn't find the motivation to sit down and focus long enough to complete a blog post.

I have missed it, however.

There are a couple things that have been stirring in my heart recently, but all of them are too big to begin putting into words at 11:16pm.

So... consider this a teaser.

Later, alligator. :)